[This is part NateWantsToBattle lyrics, and part my own words against my inner demon. Check out the music video below. Xx]
You make me cringe,
Terrified in fear of what’s to come from between my lips,
Because you are reckless,
I know this. It should be expected, but it’s not like I can stop you.
“Now I’m scared to even open my mouth
Because there’s something deep inside of me
You don’t know about”
What does that make me, then?
It’s still my own hands that will be stained with blood.
“And I wish there was a way you could see
If I could show maybe I’d know
If I’m a man or a beast”
I know when you’re lurking,
Seeking your next piece of flesh to toy with
Bat it around like Cat and Mouse
You’re so obvious.
“Just take one look in my eyes
You’d see right through my disguise
She says that when I’m nearby
That she can feel my every move”
It’s not my fault I’ve become so broken,
And now I’m spinning out of control.
You may believe that taking over me
Is the best solution, but I know better.
“When I fell apart
Yeah, something changed in my heart
As you can tell from these scars
I’m not the man that you knew before”
Sure, I mean, to cope…
You do make it easier.
Those slight moments of electricity,
Like poison in my veins.
“I found something that makes me feel alive
Yet somehow dead inside
It makes me feel
It makes me numb at once
It makes no sense
Yet it still helps me see
So am I soon to be the monster that I despise?”
But I’d rather not have to feel you to begin with
I’d rather not see your ugly head rise up
So I will fight to suppress you.
Get back, get over yourself.
I don’t need you.
“She thinks she’s mine
She must be out of her mind
I said “get back” but she wants more
And now her body’s on the floor”
And I will fight.
Until I lose this battle…
“I’ve got this thing in my heart
I have to hide
It’s eating at me from the inside”
And I will tell them.
I’ll tell them all who you really are.