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NoxxyNights

justsleepjustdream@hotmail.com

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Flesh & Fetish

Yours, Etc.

And I set this to your palm
Steel to grace the layers
Breaking open,
Sweep away the tedium
Built to exorcise the demons in my gut

Purchased flesh, your residence
I take mine at your feet

Your command spills by the whole of your irises
This essence pursues in agreement

 You conspire with me against my poor judgement
And liberate body from mind
Embrace me on every level, every realm
Every world, in every dimension
And let me honor you
My King
In each

Narcissus.

The water may sweep away my tears
An ocean between us
But would you drag the lake for me?

Thirteen knots,
                                         Thirteen knots.

Blank stares
This mirror yells at me
And I cower
I am a coward
I repent

Black streaks line this face
My charcoal warpaint
Dressed for battle
Two ram heads entangle
Struggle
                                   Pride
                                                                       Surrendering again.
Is there ever a true victor?

Scrape the glitter off on scalpels edge.
Will I still be good enough?

Addictissimus.

Show me who I am
Show me who to be
I don’t need a lot
Just you next to me
Breathe your life into me
Make me feel something new
Something different
I crave the change, the thrill
I want your hands all over me
To push and pull
Tightening fists and
Gentle caresses
Hold me like it’s the last time
Breathe me in and taste me
I want to become enveloped.

I’m addicted to the scent of
Leather,
Wine and
Incense.
To pain
And pleasure.
To the
Taste
Of
Your
Skin.
To the smell of your bones
And the blood in your veins
The light in your eyes
The dark that remains
And the tell of your sins.

I want you in the bluntest way,
Flesh to flesh,
Taking over every sense I have.
Get under my skin
And in my head
I’ll get in your bed.
I want to touch,
Feel you
Through and through
Because
Of all the things
My hands have held
The best
By far
Is
You.

Two Shots Of Whiskey For Breakfast.

I would’ve kept holding you too.
Should have.
You make it much too difficult
To leave.
Warm touches and shallow breaths
And those goddamn
Whiskey Eyes that flutter
At me before I
Peel myself from the
Inferno-fire-nest-thingy
You’ve created.
And my
Pretty
Words
Won’t
Ever
Describe
Wholly
How I am in those moments.
Not even
Early morning poetry
Does it justice.
But this,
This is all much too sentimental,
Saccharine.
My purpose was
Only to simply inform you
That I would’ve
Should’ve Stayed there
Wrapped up
Tangled in
Slumber and Limbs
And warmth.

Once Upon A Nightmare.

I think I’m falling.

I clench the sheets surrounding me, sure I’m going to plunder into the depths of the fiery abyss below. My bed; a floating haven in the afterlife, dancing among flames and lung-burning smoke.

The end of the world, and I…I’m lost in this bemusing, sombre inferno. 

Part 4 – Baby, Give Me A Break

 I glance up at wandering lips and glass eyes. I can see the storms swirling, a tormenting kind of chaos that’s ripping away at the seams of foundation. I see the walls, the splendid grandeur of the masonry fit tight to serve its purpose. Through a plethora of pain, inured to a sort of neon violence, the concrete barriers have become quintessential. A sempiternal war that rages on, and your mind, the labyrinthine battlefield. It’s a beautiful, tragic thing, but…

     You snap your fingers at me. 

     No, I didn’t hear a goddamned thing you just said. I offer a sympathetic smile and brush your cheek with my hand in a nurturing sort of way. Your stubble scratches, but this time I don’t mind. I redden with embarrassment and shoot my gaze towards the speckled linoleum tiles.

     I manage to sputter a muffled and coy apology. I really don’t mean to seem distracted or inattentive. I mean no disrespect. Can I help If those warm whiskey glances absorb and conjure my soul from this body? You far from disinterest me, with a hexing voice that lures my mind from the depths and the most fascinating, intriguing, exquisite mind that’s composed of insanity and beauty. 

     Don’t praise me for my heart, wisdom and courage; I’d die to be your ingenue.

Part 3 – Give Me Attention

     The solace I sought is fleeting from under the sheets of this queen sized bed, the heat escapes as I toss and turn, with all of the succor that you once brought seeping out. An arctic presence replaces your space, filling in every indent and crease you’ve made. I feel the cold against my back and tug at the sheets. Even in your absence, you give me chills…But if you’re gone, how is this -any of this- even real? The wall’s making faces at me again. I hear them whisper.

     You told me “Darling, you light my soul on fire.”, but I’m nearly drowning in the gasoline without your spark. All I ever wanted was to burn with you.

     I think I saw you in my dreams. I can still feel you. I reach up and caress my throat. Your cool hand like a vice, gripping tight, and I could swear it’s real. These autumn nights mock me and leave me freezing at the core; Taunting and teasing , and it seems the moon and stars are even on your side. I pray for sleep as the skies betray me.

Part 2 – Give Me Malice

     I look over my shoulder as I walk down the Ave. Glancing around at the beggars and buskers, musicians and scattered city folk. A group of kids laughing and talking, not older than 19. There’s no business dress here, no fancy outfits, but they don’t lack style; Bohemian hippies, gangsters, hipsters, and punks with perfected reflections.

    The familiar roaring of pricey, souped-up bikes rush past me, and they all turn into the parking lot of the little coffee shop tucked in between the big city businesses; A little gem in a coalmine. The cluster of shiny jet black motorcycles clutter the parking lot, and I can’t imagine a single car would make it through the maze of metal and mirrors.

     Through the populated sidewalks, busy streets, squealing tires and honking horns, hustle and chatter, sweet cinnamon and espresso scents with an undertone of cell phone ring-a-lings, I wonder where my place is in all of it. Am I the only one standing still anymore? I catch a glimpse of my melancholy reflection in the barber shop window and can’t help but stare at those empty eyes, all the while people rush around me, and I hear them curse under their breath, frustrated by my still obstruction of the walkway, I’m sure…But I drift away in that window, as if it’s a portal to another world, where people are silent and cars move in slow motion.

Part 1 – Give Me Envy

      It’s late. I’ve been pondering. I’m playing with the nicely shaped joint in my fingers, subconsciously. I snap out of my ever-reflective moment and glance at my hand, curious as to the length of time I’ve actually been fiddling, with my mind out of this world.

     The crisp autumn breeze sweeps over my face and I clench my sweater tighter to myself. The porch light pollutes my vision as I try and seek out the stars above, and wiggle back into my patio chair a bit more, an unsuccessful attempt at any sort of comfort. I take notice of a couple of those little gaseous delights winking at me, despite the wisps of clouds and the irritating city lights. I wish I was among them.

     My eyes begin to well up, and I bury my face into my knees and chest before a sob escapes. I’m too strong for that. I’m okay. I’m fine. Deep breath, and out. I remember my green in hand, brought about by a scent I caught in the breeze. I compose myself, rub my eyes and dig around my pockets for my lighter. 

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